CORVETTE QUIZZES

Corvette Quiz

  1)   What year was dual point distributors first used in? (A)1956 (B)1957 (C)1958
  2)   What year was the last year exhaust was through the bumper? (A) 1959 (B) 1960(C)1961
  3)   What year were big block engines first available in? (A)1965 (B)1966 (C)1967
  4)   In 1956 what percent of coves were painted a different color? Less then ___%
  5)   What year was the last year of the tooth grill? (A) 1959 (B) 1960 (C) 1961
  6)   What percent of Corvette sold in 1972 were coupes?
  7)   What year was aluminum valve covers first available in? (A) 1956 (B) 1957 (C) 1958
  8)   How do you tell the difference between a 1960 and a 1959?
  9)   What year was telescopic steering column first available in? (A) 1965 (B) 1966 (C) 1967
10)   What year was the last year of aluminum knock off wheels? (A)1964 (B)1965 (C)1966
11)   What year was the last year Corvette were built in St.Louis? (A)1967 (B)1972 (C)1980
12)   What was the top speed of the 1998 Corvette? (A)175 MPH (B) 180 MPH (C)185 MPH
 

Answers

Here is a site with another Corvette Quiz. (I bet Marilyn can get all of them right!)

Another quiz on the same site.

Another good quiz!

Another good quiz!

Here is one. When you get there, just select "test" and it will randomly generate a test for you

CORVETTE JOKES

A Cowboy from Woodward, Oklahoma walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Paris for an international rodeo for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000 and that he was not a depositor of the bank.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Cowboy handed over the keys to a new Corvette ZR1. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The Cowboy produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.

Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Cowboy from Oklahoma for using a $150,000 Corvette as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Corvette into the bank's private underground garage and parked it.

Two weeks later, the Cowboy returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest $23.07.

The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that you are a highly sophisticated investor and multimillionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world. Your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Woodward, Oklahoma. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The good 'ole Oklahoma boy replied, "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?" Don't mess with OKIES...

 

 

A man saw an advertisement in a paper which read, "Corvette for sale: $200." He went to view it, expecting to find a battered heap of rust, but instead found himself face to face with a gleaming new model in mint condition.
"Why are you selling it for $200?" he asked the lady.
"Simple. Last week, my husband ran off with his secretary. He said: "You can keep the house, but sell my Corvette and send the money to me."

 

A guy was driving a Yugo on the interstate when it broke down. A short while later, a Porsche stopped and the driver offered to give the Yugo a tow. "If I go too fast," said the Porsche driver, "honk your horn."

So the Porsche set off with the Yugo in tow. A few miles down the road, a Corvette pulled alongside the Porsche.

The Corvette driver called out, "I bet I can outrace you with that thing in tow behind you."

The Porsche driver was up for the challenge and the two cars sped off side by side down the highway. Two State Troopers watched in disbelief as the cars flew by.

"Did you see that Porsche and Corvette racing neck and neck?" said one.

The other said, "Yeah. And what about that little Yugo flying behind them, honking his horn, trying to pass?"

 

The 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doc," he said, "I've made love in more exotic cars than anyone I know. Must be at least a thousand."

"And now, I suppose, you want me to treat you for the arthritis you got from scrunching up in all those uncomfortable positions," the medic said.

"Heck, no," the old fellow replied. "I want to borrow your ZR-1"

 

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four-wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash. They were surprised to find in 47 of the 50 states the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!"

Only the states of South Carolina, West Virginia and Arkansas were different, where over 89.3 percent of the final words were: "Hold my beer and watch this!"

 

Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. In court the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.

"Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the lawyer.  Farmer Joe responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the..."

"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted, "just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine'?".

Farmer Joe said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road..."

The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud.  Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time the Judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say."

Joe thanked the Judge and proceeded, "Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear ol' Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans.  "Shortly after the accident, a Highway Patrolman came on the scene.  He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

"Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me. He said, 'Your mule was in such bad shape I had to shoot her.'

"Then he said, 'How are YOU feeling?'"

 

A man decided that he was going to ride a 10-speed bike from Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon City before the mountains became just too much and he could go no further. He stuck his thumb out, but after 3 hours, he hadn't gotten a single person to stop. Finally, a guy in a Corvette pulled over and offered him a ride. Of course, the bike wouldn't fit in the car. The corvette owner found a piece of rope lying by the highway and tied it to his bumper. He tied the other end to the bike and told the man that if he was going to fast, to honk the horn on his bike and he would slow down.

Everything went fine for the first 30 miles. Suddenly, another Corvette blew past them. Not to be outdone, the Corvette pulling the bike took off after the other. A short distance down the road, the Corvettes, both going well over 120 mph, blew through a speed trap.

The police officer noted the speed from his radar gun and radio to the other officer that he has two Corvettes headed his way at over 120 mph. HE then relayed, "... and you're not going to believe this, but there's a guy on a 10-speed bike honking to pass!"

 

This guy gets to the Pearly Gates, and Saint Peter says, "Now wait just a moment, before I let you in, I need to ask you, have you ever done anything to put others first, or defended the weak or innocent, things like that?"

The man answers, "why yes, I saw this man with a Corvette by the side of the road, and he was yelling at his wife, and threatening her, so I walked up to him and screamed at him to leave her alone, and if he didn't I'd kick his head like this.... and I kicked a huge place on his driver's door on that Corvette".

Saint Peter answers, "Wow, that's pretty good, when did you do that?"

The man answers, "Oh, about 4 minutes ago".

 

A young blonde female stock broker was bored with driving her Mustang.  It lacked individuality and besides that, every other girl in the
office had one.  She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an Corvette convertible.

That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Corvette C3 convertible.  It was wonderfully restored and she fell
in love with it's gorgeous red paint work.  An empty check stub later and off she was tearing down the leafy country lanes enjoying her
beautiful new car.  Her long blonde hair was flowing in the wind, music blaring from the radio, what could possibly go wrong?

Then at that thought there was a splutter from the engine and the car slowly coasted to a stop.  She got out and lifted the hood and
concluded after a few minutes that she didn't have a clue what was wrong.  Luckily she had her cell phone with her and a quick
phone call to the AutoClub and a short wait saw a bright shiny yellow van pull up behind her.

"That's a lovely car," says the mechanic.  "What seems to be the matter?"

Well, it just conked out I'm afraid."

"Let me have look."  He set to work and ten minutes later the engine was purring like a cat again.

"Thank goodness," she said. "What was the matter ?"

"Simple really, just crap in the carburetor," he replied.

Looking shocked she asked, "Oh, OK. How many times a week do I have to do that?"
 

 

 A woman answered the knock at her door and found a destitute man.  He wanted to earn money by doing odd jobs, so she asked, "Can you
paint?"

 "Yes," he said, "I'm a pretty good painter."

 "Well, there's a gallon of green paint and a brush out back, and a porch that needs repainting.  Be very careful.  When you're done,
I'll look it over and pay you what it's worth."

It wasn't more than an hour before he knocked again. "All finished!", he reported with a smile.

"Did you do a good job?" she asked.

"Yes, but lady, there's one thing I'd like to point out to you," he said, "That's not a Porsche back there -- it's a Corvette!"

 

 

You know its time to get a new Corvette when.....
 1. You spend more on oil than on gasl
 2. Your car leaves three types of liquid in your parking space
 3. You offer a friend a lift and they say no because they are
    in a hurry
 4. You feel good if you beat a cyclist at the lights
 5. You get invited to join a car restoration club
 6. Your neighbors all chip in to buy you a car cover
 7. Your car leaves more smoke than a David Copperfield show.
 8. Somebody breaks in and fits a radio
 9. Hitch hikers hide when they see you coming
10. And Finally, you know its time to change that car when some
    old duffer tells you that they are the best car ever made.

 

 

 Does your car make a statement? Probably so. Here's a list of cars and the statements they make on their drivers' behalf.
 
 Acura Integra
 I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
 
 Acura Legendary
 I'm too bland for German cars.
 
 Acura NSX
 I am impotent.
 
 AMC Gremlin
 I could only afford three-fourths of a Hornet.
 
 AMC Marlin
 My father wouldn't buy me a Camaro.
 
 Audi 90
 I enjoy putting out engine fires
 
 Audi 80
 I thought the 4000s was too fast.
 
 Austin-Healey 3000
 I can put raw meat on the transmission hump and have a well
done steak by the time I arrive anywhere.
 
 Buick Park Avenue
 I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
 
 Buick Riviera Convertible
 I'm not very smart, and I look like it too.
 
 Buick Electra
 Hey, it's 30-year old technology. But it's GOOD 30-year old technology.
 
 Buick Reatta
 I like ugly, impractical, boring cars.
 
 Cadillac Cimarron
 I am stupid enough to pay extra money for an uglified Chevrolet.
 
 Cadillac Eldorado
 I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
 
 Cadillac Seville
 I am a pimp.
 
 Chevrolet Camaro
 I enjoy beating up people.
 
 Chevrolet Chevette
 I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette.
 
 Chevrolet Corvette
 I'm in a mid-life crisis.
 
 Chevrolet El Camino
 I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
 
 Chrysler 5th Ave
 Did the pushpins come free with the headliner?
 
 Chrysler Cordoba
 I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
 
 Datsun 280Z
 I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
 
 Dodge Charger
 Reliable is boring. My car is exciting.
 
 Dodge Dart
 I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower.
 
 Dodge Daytona
 I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
 
 Ford Fairmont
 (See Dodge Dart)
 
 Ford Mustang
 I slow down to 85 in school zones.
 
 Ford Crown Victoria
 I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up
behind them.
 
 Geo Storm
 I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
 
 Geo Tracker
 I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
 
 Honda del Sol
 I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible
at all.
 
 Honda Civic
 I have just graduated and have no credit.
 
 Honda Accord
 I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
 
 Infiniti Q45
 I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
 
 Isuzu Impulse
 I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
 
 Jaguar XJ6
 I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days
per year.
 
 Jeep Wrangler
 I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with Jeeps.
 
 Kia Sephia
 I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu.
 
 Lotus Esprit
 Ever pay $2000 for a tune up? I do.
 
 Lincoln Town Car
 I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
 
 Mercedes 500SL
 I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
 
 Mazda Miata
 I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
 
 MGB
 I am dating a mechanic.
 
 Mitsubishi Diamante
 I don't know what it means either.
 
 Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
 Why accelerate? Because you can!
 
 Nissan 300ZX
 I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
 
 Oldsmobile Cutlass
 I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts.
 
 Peugeot 505 Diesel
 I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
 
 Plymouth Fury
 I like driving an air-conditioned sofa that can carry your car in my
trunk as a spare.
 
 Plymouth Neon
 I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
 
 Pontiac Trans AM
 I have a switchblade in my sock.
 
 Porsche 944
 I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me.
 
 Renault 2CV
 I think your car is ugly too.
 
 Rolls Royce Silver Shadow
 I think Pat Buchanan is a tad too liberal.
 
 Subaru Legacy
 I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu.
 
 Triumph TR6
 I am an amateur mechanic who enjoys a challenge.
 
 Toyota Camry
 I am still in the closet.
 
 Volkswagon Beetle
 I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
 
 Volkswagon Cabriolet
 I am out of the closet.
 
 VW Rabbit GTi
 My mom won't let me buy a Porsche 'til I finish Algebra.
 
 VW Jetta
 I stopped smoking pot when I got a real job after college. I swear.
 
 Volkswagon Microbus
 I am tripping right now.
 
 Volvo 740 Wagon
 I am frightened of my wife.
 
 Volvo 240
 Other drivers are unsafe. Let me go ahead and pull out in front of this
guy to slow him down.